


Flufftember #8

by adrianna_m_scovill



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Declarations Of Love, F/M, Fluff, Public Display of Affection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 06:14:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26468512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adrianna_m_scovill/pseuds/adrianna_m_scovill
Summary: Flufftember prompts:Barson - PDA (this is pretty lightweight PDA though, sorry)
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Olivia Benson
Comments: 3
Kudos: 82
Collections: Flufftember 2020





	Flufftember #8

“I wish I’d spent more time looking at the stars as a kid.”

Benson turned her head on her arm, studying his profile as he stared upward. The starlight shone in his eyes as he surveyed the constellations. 

“I came here once, on a school trip,” he continued quietly without looking at her. They were lying side by side on the floor, their jackets laid out to protect their clothes from any dirt on the thin carpeting. “It made me feel so small and insignificant. It was overwhelming. People, adults would say it helped us see that we were part of something bigger, but I hated it. It was terrifying.” 

He finally looked at her, adjusting his head on his arm. “I felt pretty insignificant already, most days. I wanted to be a big fish in a little pond, not a speck of dust in an immeasurable sea of lights.” He paused, considering. “Mixed metaphors aside, I spent a long time trying to prove I had purpose, meaning. That my existence meant something.” He exhaled quietly. “I wasted a lot of time. Now…” He lifted his hand in a small gesture toward the stars glittering above them without taking his eyes from hers. “Look at all this beauty and possibility.”

She smiled. “I always loved looking at the stars.”

“I’m not surprised.”

“It’s a totally different experience, seeing the sky outside the city. But here? Here, you can look at the sky and imagine you’re _anywhere_. I came here on a class trip, too. It was like a whole new world. For a thirteen-year-old girl who wanted to escape.” She regarded him in silence for a moment. “We lived so many miles apart, but there’s still a possibility we ended up here at the same time without realizing.”

“Considering the fact when you were thirteen I was only—”

“Careful, Barba.”

He laughed quietly. Their hands were lying on the floor between them, and he shifted his until his knuckles brushed hers. “Maybe we were never here at the same time but we still looked up at the same view. It still affected us, our lives. I saw fear and futility, and you saw possibility.”

“Futility? You worked your ass off to get what you wanted. Think about it, Rafael,” she said, tipping her chin toward the ceiling, “you were willing to literally take on the _world_.”

“Hmm,” he said with a smile, his fingers snaking between hers. “You chose optimism. ‘We are all in the gutter but some of us are looking at the stars.’”

“Who said that?” she asked, curling her fingers around his.

“Oscar Wilde.” He turned his head to look up at the night sky. “I wish you’d been beside me the first time I looked at this view.”

“As what, your babysitter?”

He chuckled, the light and shadows dancing across his face. “I’ve never been afraid of anything when you’re beside me. Well...almost nothing.”

She shifted closer until their arms and shoulders were pressed together, their hands joined. “I would’ve protected you if I could’ve.”

He looked at her. “I know,” he murmured. “I would’ve protected you. If I could have.”

“I know. But here we are.”

“Here we are,” he agreed. He sighed softly, but the sound wasn’t mournful. He seemed content, and his thumb stroked hers idly. “A little dinged up but mostly intact.” He hesitated for a moment. “Do you mind if I buy Noah a telescope?”

“He’d like that.”

“You think?”

“As long as you don’t spend too much money on something he might break. I should bring him here, he hasn’t been.”

“Am I invited?” he asked, offering her a lopsided smile.

She let go of his hand and rolled onto her side facing him, propping her elbow on the floor and her cheek on her fist. “You’ve never needed an invitation. You’re always welcome. _Always_. But I do think we should talk about where we stand now that you’re back.”

“I didn’t understand, as a kid. About being part of something bigger than ourselves? I thought that meant I had less value, but I get it now. I’m better with you. I’m better with Noah. I hope that where we _stand_ is together, Liv. I always want to look at the stars with you.”

She laid her hand on his chest. “I love you, Rafael, you know that. And I always want you beside me. But...I have a son, and I need you to be a little clearer about what you want.”

“I’m in love with you,” he said softly, laying his hand over hers on his chest. “I’ve always been. Please forgive me for not saying the words when you needed to hear them.”

She smiled, fingering the buttons of his shirt. “I know that. Not that I don’t like hearing it, but my question is, what’re you gonna do about it?”

“I thought I’d start by earning back Noah’s trust. And hopefully yours in the process. And maybe the two of you can teach me a few things about stargazing and optimism and...being a family.”

She leaned closer. “I like the sound of that. But I meant, what are you going to do about it right _now_?”

He reached up and tucked her hair behind her ear, studying her face in the starlight. After a moment he pulled her down until her lips were almost touching his and then he paused, searching her eyes for permission. She closed the remaining distance, touching her lips to his. His kiss was soft, pliable—undemanding, but she could feel the simmering urgency beneath. 

She pressed closer, flattening her breasts against his chest, deepening the kiss as she felt his fingers tangle in her hair. They’d waited so long for this moment that it was overwhelming to finally be together with their feelings laid bare between them. The world around them disappeared, leaving them cocooned in the mingled scent of cologne and perfume, safe from the weight of all the stars sparkling above them. 

The sound of someone clearing his throat brought them crashing back to reality and made them pull apart, but not far. “The museum will be closing shortly,” a young man said from only a few yards away.

“Thank you,” Barba answered, grinning when Benson buried her face against his shoulder with an embarrassed laugh. They were a little old to feel like teenagers caught making out in the planetarium. “We’ll leave.” He kissed Benson’s head as the young man walked away. “Still up for dinner?” he asked quietly.

“Of course,” she said, planting another kiss on his lips. “But let’s take a walk first.” It was too cold to lie out under the real night sky, but the lights of the city held a special place in both their hearts, too.


End file.
